Her Mom’s Doctors Advise Surgery, But She Chooses Herbal Remedies Instead
Unsplash, Reddit
When a loved one is facing a medical crisis, it’s natural to want to provide support in every way possible. However, situations can become complicated when the choices made by the individual conflict with professional medical advice. This is exactly what one daughter is currently dealing with, and she’s questioning whether she should continue providing financial support to her mother if she refuses recommended treatment.
A Difficult Decision
The daughter shared her story on a public forum, asking if it was justified to cut off financial support if her mother refused medical help. Her mother was recently diagnosed with thyroid cancer, and doctors have advised a complete thyroidectomy. Despite this, the mother is refusing the surgery and instead prefers to rely on herbal remedies. The daughter is caught between her desire to support her family and her concern for her mother’s health.
She explained that her mother had previously undergone a partial thyroidectomy through a medical mission, which required traveling hours from their city. Now, the same medical team is recommending another procedure, but her mother is not cooperating. Instead, she believes the diagnosis is a scam designed to get money out of her, even though she isn’t spending anything. All the expenses are coming from the daughter and her father.
Emotional and Financial Burden
The daughter also mentioned that her mother is recovering from the previous surgery and is taking care of her two young stepchildren. Their biological father was neglectful and abusive, so the mother has full custody. This adds to the daughter’s emotional and financial burden, as she is responsible for both her mother and the children.
She feels that continuing to provide financial support could be enabling her mother’s refusal of treatment. She is worried about the consequences if her mother’s condition worsens, especially since she would then be responsible for raising her siblings as well. When she finally broke down emotionally, her mother responded with self-pity and tears, which only deepened the daughter’s frustration.
Lack of Trust and Agency
Another layer of the conflict is the daughter’s feeling of being manipulated by her father and a family friend/aunt. She believes they are influencing her decisions, despite the fact that they are helping her navigate the complex process of medical paperwork, hospital visits, and financial responsibilities. At 22 years old, she feels she needs adult guidance to make informed choices.
Her mother, however, continues to dismiss the medical advice, insisting that the herbs she found online will be sufficient. The daughter is frustrated by the lack of trust and the sense that her own agency is being undermined.
Public Reaction
The post sparked a range of reactions from readers. Some agreed that financially supporting her mother’s dangerous decisions was not the right choice. Others suggested that combining surgery with holistic treatments might be an option, but many emphasized the importance of following medical recommendations.
Good point.
Yeah, sadly this is the right move.
There is no reason to support her dangerous decisions financially.
This commenter has some good advice.
Final Thoughts
The situation highlights the difficult balance between compassion and responsibility. While it’s important to support loved ones, it’s equally crucial to consider the long-term consequences of their choices. In this case, the daughter is struggling to find a path that protects her family while respecting her mother’s autonomy. It’s a tough decision, and there may not be a clear answer—only the best choice based on the information available.
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