8 Behaviors of Those Struggling With Self-Awareness, Psychologists Say
Understanding Self-Awareness and Its Importance
In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to feel disconnected from ourselves. Whether we’re glued to our phones, binge-watching shows, or playing games that transport us away from reality, many of us find ourselves disengaged from the present moment. This disconnection can lead to a lack of self-awareness, which is the ability to understand our thoughts, emotions, and motivations on a deeper level. According to research from 2018, only about 15% of people are sufficiently self-aware.
Self-awareness allows us to understand why we act, feel, and think the way we do. It helps us recognize what we need for change and fosters a sense of personal growth. Dr. Natalie Bernstein, a licensed psychologist, explains that self-awareness is crucial for understanding our internal world. Similarly, Dr. Jenna Budreau-Roman, a licensed clinical psychologist and founder of Love and Theory, emphasizes that self-awareness helps us identify our strengths and weaknesses and encourages humility—allowing us to admit when we don’t have the answers and take accountability for our mistakes.
The Roots of Self-Awareness
Self-awareness isn’t something we’re born with; it requires experiences that encourage internal evaluation. Dr. Bernstein notes that those who struggle with self-awareness may have grown up in environments where reflection and self-expression weren’t encouraged. This lack of opportunity for introspection can hinder the development of self-awareness.
Dr. Budreau-Roman adds that self-awareness often develops during childhood. If children grow up in homes where emotions aren’t expressed healthily, they may never learn how to identify and cope with their feelings. Additionally, traumatic experiences can lead to a lack of self-awareness as a protective mechanism. Emotions can feel overwhelming, and individuals may numb themselves to avoid discomfort.
Signs of Low Self-Awareness
If you suspect that you or someone you know lacks self-awareness, there are several behaviors to look out for:
Reacting impulsively
People without self-awareness may make rash decisions or engage in extreme actions without considering the consequences. They might later wonder, “Why did I do that?”Having sudden outbursts
Without awareness of their emotional triggers, individuals may react suddenly, such as yelling, crying, or storming out of a room. These outbursts can damage relationships over time.Lacking empathy
A lack of self-awareness can make it difficult to understand others’ emotions. If someone doesn’t fully grasp their own feelings, they may struggle to empathize with others.Blaming others
Those who lack self-awareness may blame others for their actions, failing to take responsibility for disagreements.Inability to admit wrongdoing
Individuals with low self-awareness may avoid taking accountability for their mistakes, instead becoming defensive or shutting down conversations.Struggling with identity
A lack of self-awareness can leave individuals feeling confused about who they are or where they’re headed.Being judgmental
Without self-reflection, people may accept their initial assumptions as facts, leading to rigid judgments that can strain relationships.Practicing black and white thinking
Seeing things as either right or wrong, good or bad, without room for nuance, is common among those with limited self-awareness.
Improving Self-Awareness
If you want to boost your self-awareness, there are several strategies you can try:
- Check in with yourself throughout the day: Set a timer to ask, “How am I feeling? Can I name three emotions I’ve experienced today?”
- Journal freely: Write down your thoughts without editing or censoring them. This can help bring hidden emotions to the surface.
- Ask for feedback: Talk to loved ones and ask for their perspective on how you’re perceived.
- Name your feelings: When you experience an emotion, pause and name it. Pay attention to physical sensations that accompany it.
- Seek professional help: Working with a licensed mental health professional can provide guidance and support on your journey toward self-awareness.
As Dr. Bernstein notes, self-awareness is a process that takes time and effort. It’s not about weakness but growth. By cultivating self-awareness, we can build deeper connections with ourselves and others.
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